I’m following Firefly’s suit and answering some random questions for no real reason. Mondays are hell. People who go to hell have Mondays every day.
Back to the Q&A.
When were you happiest?
When my siblings and I were taken to get icecream. The anticipation and giggles in the car. Labouring over a few choices (always the same ones!). Those first and last bites and all in between.
What is your greatest fear?
Losing my sister to an illness or seeing her suffer.
What is your earliest memory?
My father teaching me to swim in the ocean as a toddler. My hands would hang off his neck for dear life. Salt water hurt my eyes. My mother who hated swimming screamed encouraging words from the beach.
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
I ruminate.
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Cruelty.
Aside from a property, what’s the most expensive thing you’ve ever bought?
My crummy car. *tears rolling down cheeks*. The busted-engine sign has been on for about a week.
What is your most treasured possession?
My mind.
What would your super power be?
I would see the future.
What makes you depressed?
The feeling that I’m holding my breath for nothing.
What do you most dislike about your appearance?
I wish I didn’t gain weight EVERYWHERE.
Who would play you in the film of your life?
The thought is too creepy.
What is your guiltiest pleasure?
Hours and hours and hours of TV watching.
What do you owe your parents?
Teaching me that all people are fallible.
What is the worst job you’ve ever done?
I was a lifeguard for 2 summers. I hate public swimming pools and I hate children under 12.
What has been your biggest disappointment?
I abandoned a childhood dream.
Who would you invite to your dream dinner party?
My maternal grandfather. He died before I was born.
What is the worst thing anyone’s ever said to you?
That I wasn’t going to amount to anything. I knew they were being cruel but words can wound.
What does love feel like?
Romantic love? Like you’ve lost your mind and have just enough consciousness to know that you’ve lost your mind.
Which living person do you most despise, and why?
A first degree relative. Don’t ask.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
Shit. Fuck. Kiss my ass. I use them mostly when on the road, driving long distance.
If you could edit your past, what would you change?
I would stay true to my dreams as a child.
When did you last cry, and why?
I don’t remember. It’s Monday and I’m in the midwest. I feel like crying now.
How do you relax?
I walk. I’ve begun running and it’s more relaxing.
What is the closest you’ve ever come to death?
I feel off a cliff and was unconscious for 2 days. I was 5.
What single thing would improve the quality of your life?
Money. Lots of it.
What keeps you awake at night?
Fear for my loved ones’ health.
What song would you like played at your funeral?
Song??!! Nobody better fucking sing and dance when I’m dead. When I die, fun dies with me.
What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
Not everyone who says that they love you will be there for you.
Where would you most like to be right now?
On a beach, warm sand between my toes, the sounds of demon children laughing and playing.
February 26, 2007 at 10:20 pm
Families and money…the running themes of our lives, ey? It feels rather invasive reading your answers, did you feel the same way about mine? Very strange feeling.
The most important possession: you know it never even occurred to me to consider something non-material? What does that say? LoL.
Very interesting, Aya. Thanks for answering them.
February 26, 2007 at 10:42 pm
Thanks, firefly.
I did feel like I was intruding upon your space when reading your answers as well. It helps that we’re anonymous (I hope, anyway) but it does feel too much like sitting on a psychoanalyst’s chair.
About the important possession: lol, I couldn’t come up with anything physical. All I have is my dying car, my laptop and 1 bag, in case I take off and leave all behind.
February 28, 2007 at 2:28 am
I thought cars were property as well?
Anyway, I always enjoy reading your posts – I just wish you write more often.
On the list, wow, do you remember we used to call it Jalaato not ice cream? I don’t remember the last time I had Jalaato. And I would love to meet my paternal grandfather – he died few weeks after I was born, but he managed to name me. My mom told me that she didn’t even go to into umul for me because she was taking care of my grandfather. Coincidentally, he looks exactly like me – like identical twins..lol. Funny story, when I was about 12 in a different city, a man stopped me and asked me if I’m Omar Jiis’s (he lost his leg in WWII) son, and I told him that I was his grandson, not his son. That was the first and the last time I saw that guy. Afterward, he gave me a boqol shiling because it was right after Eid.
February 28, 2007 at 3:42 pm
Om,
Lol, cars are property indeed.
Thanks, friend, and I promise to quit being a lazy bum and write more often.
Jalaato. So many memories. My father used to take us to Asad ice cream and we couldn’t get enough. The real surprise would be when he let us have seconds every once in a while.
You grandfather fought in WWII? How fascinating! Do you know where he fought? My grandpa’s brother did too (in North Africa for the brits) and was never the same man again as we were told.
February 28, 2007 at 4:40 pm
If really abandoning a childhood dream has been your greatest disappointment in life, then thank God gal, you’ve lived a very happy life so far…
February 28, 2007 at 6:33 pm
wasmaniac,
Not only happy but challenging, surprising, and even satisfying. Even so, disappointment with self, tragedy, fear and pain are present in most lives.
March 1, 2007 at 1:30 pm
hey sup Aya, you got a prity interesting blog this is a brother saying hi from the uk,i some how enjoy reading your blog ammoung all the others,which am not bothered with.no time…lol anyways about ur Q&A Live as if your were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin–real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life…they say Expecting life to treat you well because you are a good person is like expecting an angry bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.anyways sis i was reading an older post about u starting running soon, which am shure u have already… exercise does u a lot of good,am shure ur well aware of that..and good luck with it.
salaam
March 2, 2007 at 8:23 pm
I don’t know precisely where he fought, but he was drafted by the Italians and did lose one of his leg in the war.
March 4, 2007 at 6:36 am
mq,
Thanks and welcome to my neck of the woods! I, too, spent a great deal of time delaying my life, thinking that happiness was one more thing away. Our lives do start when we draw our first birth, don’ they? Lol at the bull/vegetarian scenario, how true!
Thanks again for the well wishes. The running has begun but how well it turns out remains to be seen.
March 4, 2007 at 6:37 pm
Aya the sound of demond children?
what a glimps to Aya’s world eh dreams sometimes cross over to the real world and sometimes they don’t but there is beauty in having them regardless
Naima
March 4, 2007 at 9:15 pm
Naima,
Welcome to my cave!
Dreams do make life a little easier to bear, don’t they? In my universe, loud, ill-mannered children are satan’s spawns
.